Confidence is about self-love

Since becoming a mummy my body has changed significantly, gone were the days where I could wear no bra & still have boobs that were round, firm & perked. A bum that made Beyonce's look average and an hourglass figure that made a sand timer look shapeless. Over the last 9 years my body has been a cosy baby oven home to 5 babies, but only birthed 2, my boobs were a source of food & comfort to my son until he was 3.5 years old (I loved breastfeeding please don't judge me). My stomach has a million stretch marks, (like a tiger I earned my stripes) my gynecological problems often make me bloated, & I have experienced the trauma of stress-related hair loss.

BUT 3 years ago I made the decision to celebrate me more, accept the things I can not change, honor the traumas as part of my story & fall back in love with me.

Ok so even us confidence coaches, need to work on our confidence daily! It has not been an easy journey, it has not been without personal challenge.

But my biggest realisation is that it is easier to stay stuck and paralysed by negative emotions than it is to make the decision to take back the control, step out of the comfort zone & love yourself again, knowing that you are enough JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

Fast forward to today, some may say it's cocky & way to confident but I BLOODY LOVE MYSELF like never before! Mindset work has taught me to see things from another perspective...

👑I love my saggy boobs, they helped me feed nourish & comfort two amazing little people. Some women have to have theirs removed, so I'm grateful for mine.

👑My stretch marks are a constant reminder of the amazing ability to make grow, carry & birth children, some women would love them, so I am grateful for my pregnancy souvenir.

👑My bum may not be a perked as it once was, but my hubbles loves it, and it fills out a pair of bridget jones knickers perfectly😂, making me feel comfortable. So I'm grateful for mine.

👑My weak patchy hair no longer has to be hidden under a wig, it grown back healthy curly & strong 🙌. I love my new crown so much, I don't want to upset it with any heat or chemicals. So I'm grateful for my afro.

👑I may not have an hourglass figure anymore, but who cares! My body has two arms & two legs so I'm grateful for mine.

You see my biggest most powerful learning over the last 3 years of self-acceptance, is that I AM ENOUGH JUST THE WAY I AM. It has been life-changing stuff, I couldn't give two hoots what people think of me if I like it & I'm happy that's all that matters.

You see, confidence isn't about how we look, what we have, where we go, how much money we have, what we drive, the size of our house, our job title, designer clothes, makeup, hairstyles the list goes on.

Confidence is about self-love, acceptance, gratitude, perspective... & above all having the courage to reframe the mindset & step out of our comfort zones if all the above is not in place. When we do this, we automatically & very naturally feel better, more positive & comfortable to just be who we are authentically.

Being a Confidence Coach for women is something I do, & do very well because I have road-tested all that I teach. I literally am what I do, I am not one of the woo woo Coaches that speak hogwash. I help & support real women with real tried & tested ways that will help you become happier & more fulfilled with yourself. I adore this work, it literally gives me life, fulfillment & happiness.

Here is a recent picture of me, hubbles & I was invited to a wedding by the coast, so we made a long weekend of it. Being a mummy on the go all the time, I rarely get a chance to spend time getting dressed up. It's usually a rushed half hour before we head out the door job! But during this beautiful Mr & Mrs. Chappell weekend, with our masterpieces at their grandparents. I had the chance to really dress up for me, so I chose a fun little number that dressed my perfectly imperfect body well & I felt great.

There is nothing better than celebrating you, all that you are, all that you have been & all that you will go on to do. The good the bad & the bits in between.

So today I'm inviting you to be honest, share below your thoughts from this post, How did it make you feel? Did it resonate? Do you have anything to share? Because if there is anything that I can support you with I promise I will.

The M:MK Coaching 'Me Time' Retreat

I am delighted to announce that on Sunday 29th September between the hours of 10am until 2pm, I will be hosting another women's 'Me Time' retreat, offering women the opportunity to relax, refresh and recharge. The 'Me Time' retreat is for women seeking the opportunity to connect with other women, who understand the importance of reserving time to take time out for themselves, to go on a journey of self-discovery to reconnect with their goals dreams & aspirations to become more happier and fulfilled. Beautifully complemented by two NLP based clarity coaching workshops, focusing on mindfulness, visualisation, aiding a process of identifying goals and creating an easy to follow actionable plan to make your goals achievable. beautifully complimented by pockets of uninterrupted rest and relaxation, allowing you time to simply exhale and reboot. 

To learn more about this retreat click here.

The day will include:

• A movement in motion class
• An artisian lunch.
• An NLP visualisation and mindfulness workshop.
• An NLP goal setting and accountability session workshop. 
• A 45-minute relaxation Salt Therapy session.

I was delighted to tell you that about The 2019 M|MK Coaching 'Me Time' retreat, now I am simply excited to tell you that the booking line is now open! I am only releasing this beautiful experience to just 8 spaces, as I will be hosting the day with a cocoon coaching approach, allowing each & every woman who attends, the space to feel valued focused on.

I really hope to see you at the retreat my lovely, remember you deserve this! 

I was interviewed yesterday afternoon for a PR piece celebrating inspirational women, & was asked this question...

"Bianca, you have reached admirable levels of success within what you call #MumpreneurLand, inspiring many women & many more women to come. We would love to know who inspires you?"

My three-part answer came out my mouth with ease, confidence & pride as it has done for many years now, it was...

"Mum-mum is the biggest inspiration to me, she has taught me how to be a strong mummy & a powerful woman in business, why? Because that is who she is... effortlessly!"

The women I meet within my coaching practice & my Mumpreneur tribe say I inspire them... the truth is they are my inspiration!

Finally, I believe the essential fundamentals of Womanhood is having the ability to know that being different is not the key to confidence, but having the ability to simply be you is! When a woman decides to defy the social expectations of who society molds her to be, she becomes a force to be reckoned with. She knows that being her true authentic self creates a confidence that she is able to wear confidently becoming her own icon that shines a light to those who choose to see it. Just like the beautiful Gabrielle Chanel Founder of CHANEL. Her words, her style, & her whole ideology of who a woman is & the power we have, I'm talking about real woman like you & I. 

That is what inspires me.

I love coaching at any time of the day, but there is something quite magical about an evening coaching call with a client that makes my heart smile. Perhaps its the safe space that I create, giving her permission to exhale from the day, be honest with her answering and explore her thoughts. Perhaps it's my relaxed approach to coaching that feels like two girls simply having a chit chat, I don't know. But I do know that the mindset shifts that happened with the women I coached this evening was the start of something new.

Remember, you can release yourself from your past and immediately begin the process of building a new you. What awaits you on the other side of change is joy and power. Supporting women through a season of transformational change is an honor. To learn more about what an M:MK Coaching journey could look like for you, email hello@mmkcaoching.co.uk to request a complimentary 15-minute call.

I was asked "Bianca, how do you do it? How have you managed to build an empire from the group up, that's grown into more than just a business, it's a brand. Whilst motivating & showing such love & passion to your followers, be present online more than enough to be noticed, raise a beautiful & happy family, a home, & always have a smile on your face! What's your formula Bianca?"

After a long pause, I replied "...babes, come to think of it. I don't know, I guess as Mums we just do....right?" We both laughed & move on, but the fact is she left me amazed, by the very thought of myself. I started to think, you know that deep introspective kind of thinking us mums, women & self-employed thinking were so good at. Then I realised

This is no 'overnight thing', I have been working on my empire, brand... dream continuously & subconsciously since 2009. I spend on average 65% of my day in #MumpreneurLand managing my social media platforms, sourcing content, to inspire, motivate, empower, bring knowledge & support to my followers just like you reading this right now, for free.

I run not only a network that's the main objective is to support Mumpreneurs, but I also host 2 sometimes 3 LIVE events a week to create a platform for Mumpreneurs to learn, grow & develop their businesswoman journey. Daily I Coach my clients who remind me daily, that being a Life & Business Coach is so rewarding & I'm honored to be their chosen Coach. They say I inspire them, the truth is.... they are my inspiration.

Just like you, I think, think again, then rethink some more, about the next move in business, question my decision then question it again. Then get stressed with myself, shed a few tears, then go back to feeling on top of the world again. All in the space of hmm 5 minutes haha...

Just like you, I make millions of wrong moves, decisions & miss opportunities all because of fear.

Just like you, I know as a Mumpreneur it's lonely at the top. I know that at times being self-employed is like searching for water in the desert. I know that it's an overwhelming experience where you are pushed & challenged every minute of every day as you build your brand... & dream.

Just like you, I have lost friends who thought I was too big for my boots when I bravely decided to follow my working dream.

Just like you, I suffer from massive 'Mum guilt' because I have to regularly decide between responding to the children, or responding to a client, follower or my own needs all at the same time!

Just like you, I have to ask myself questions, answer them, then contest them, in order to identify what really is the next best business move haha...

But you know what the saddest thing about it all is my lovely...

Just like you, I have never really stopped to think about all I do, & even give myself a little pat on the back for it. Why? WELL because it's just what we do right? & we always just make it happen.

Because the truth is. Having said all that, daily there are a million more of amazing, rewarding, moments of pride, happiness, can't keep the smile off your face joy, inner joy that warms your heart joy that brings a sense of fulfillment & confidence. That make the very same people who probably laughed at you because they didn't understand why you decided to follow your dream. Now ask you how you did it.

So for those of you reading this, & who follow me thinking "... blimey, how does Bianca do it?" I want you to know this, I'm not amazing, together we are amazing. Because just like you my lovely, I'm walking the same path, experiencing the same punches this journey of Mumpreneur life has to throw. Yet just like you, I still haven't given up.

Why? Because this is what we do, & we are doing it brilliantly.

Supporting, empowering, motivating, mums & Mumpreneurs is my life's calling, & I'm honored to respond to the call. Remember my lovely, you are Amazing, & your doing a great job. So go ahead & give yourself a little pat on the back. You deserve it.

As women, we are often taught to feel so much shame about everything — from the way we look to the way we mother (or don’t), to the way we handle our finances & career.

Take a moment to stop the negative shame spiral & tell yourself the truth: You are good enough. You are worthy of love and respect. You are doing the best you can.

I absolutely adore being a Mumpreneurs Business Clarity Coach. There is something very humbling about being trusted to support a woman, on her journey of fulfillment & development, reconnecting with her signature self.

Today I'm spending the day meeting with two of my Clients that are coming to the end of the coaching program with me. And I'm so excited to share with them, my Butterfly Cards. That invited them to confidently connect with all the positive characteristics & personal attributes that encompass who they are.

This is always such a calming & beautiful 1:1 session. I can't wait!